A Marvelous, But Batty Family
by Windrises
Summary: Batman and Captain Marvel have different ways of fighting crime, but will they be able to forget about that and help each other save Gotham?


Notes: Captain Marvel is owned by Marvel and was created by Gene Colan and Roy Thomas. Batman is owned by DC Comics and was created by writer Bill Finger and artist Bob Kane.

One of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s guards was feeling so tired and bored. He had been a guard for months and nobody had tried to break in. He felt like his job had so little impact, he might as well leave the area unguarded. He had an immature smile on his face, while saying to himself, "You know what? I deserve a break. Leaving this place unguarded, for the night, won't be a problem." He started packing up his stuff and walking out. He didn't bother locking the front-door. In fact, he forgot to close the door.

A few minutes later, a mysterious figure snuck into S.H.I.E.L.D. She quickly destroyed the security-cameras and started breaking into the technology room. The intruder was Magpie, a bird-themed villainous, with a peculiar addiction to shiny objects. While roaming around, Magpie found a giant machine. She fiddled with it, while saying, How shiny." The machine had enough power, to eliminate a city. Magpie was planning on stealing it.

Suddenly, a couple of guards came into the room. They saw Magpie and tried to shoot her. However, Magpie hid behind the machine. The guards shot and destroyed the machine, which was worth a million dollars. The guards nervously laughed, while Magpie jumped on them and knocked them to the ground. Magpie said, "I'm thankful for this place's lack of proper security. It's too bad they wrecked such a valuable machine. However, there's plenty more for me to take." She found crates of shiny-blasters. Magpie mischievously smiled, while taking the crates and running away.

The next day, Captain Marvel was on another plant. She was singing a rap song, about lamps, when her communicator started beeping. It was the first time her communicator had made a noise, in years. She figured it was something important, so she faced her alien friends and said, "I'm afraid Earth needs me."

A few minutes later, Captain Marvel flew into Nick Fury's office. Nick Fury saw all property damage Captain Marvel's entrance caused, so he said, "We're already having enough money problems."

Captain Marvel smiled and asked, "Even this place is having money problems? It seems like my old-friend, Tony Jay, was right about everybody needing to have money. I was at one of the biggest alien-themed parties of the year, so this better be important."

Nick replied, "Technology was stolen from S.H.I.E.L.D. Somebody, in a bird-themed costume, stole blasters that are worth tons of money, but that's not the real problem. Those blasters have enough power to defeat cities of people."

Captain Marvel confidently responded, "Don't worry, Nicolas. I'll bring the villain to justice, with my marvelous powers."

Nick replied, "I told you to call me Fury, not Nicolas."

Captain Marvel smirked and responded, "I should of known that'd make you furious." She chuckled.

Nick replied, "Anyways, the thief snuck onto an airplane that's headed for Gotham."

Captain Marvel said, "Very well then. I'll go to Gotham and send that rotten criminal back to their bird's nest." She started flying to Gotham.

Meanwhile, Bruce Wayne was at a fancy party. He often pretended to be an immature playboy, so nobody would suspect he was the world's most heroic and darkest superhero. While at the party, he danced on people's heads and drank sodas, that expired a few decades ago.

Bruce looked in the sky and saw the Bat-Signal. Bruce felt relieved about that, because it meant he could stop pretending to be a goofball and start acting like a responsible superhero. He went into the Batcave, got on his Batman costume, and went into the Batmobile.

Several minutes later, Batman arrived on the police station's rooftop. He faced Commissioner Gordon and asked, "What's going on?"

Commissioner Gordon answered, "We have an odd situation going on."

Batman replied, "Jim, I've battled the world's weirdest criminals. I've fought eggs, kites, even bubbles. Whatever's going on is nothing, that I couldn't be prepared for. So, what's up?"

Commissioner Gordon responded, "Magpie went a few countries away and stole some weird blasters. I don't know what she'd do with them and why she flew thousands of miles, just to get them."

Batman put his hand on his chin and thought about the situation. Magpie may be dangerous, but Batman knew she wasn't some kind of mastermind or someone who seemed world-domination. Because of that, Magpie wouldn't have much use for the blasters. After a brief moment of thinking, Batman was starting to figure-out the situation. He said, "She's not going to use the blasters. She's going to give them to someone else."

Commissioner Gordon looked confused, while asking, "Who would want such dangerous devices? Whoever gets those blasters could dominate all of Gotham. Who'd want that?"

Batman answered, "Gotham's most high-profile, but dangerous citizen."

Batman used a grappling-hook, to get back to the ground. He started walking back to the Batmobile, while noticing that Captain Marvel was standing next to it. Batman had a surprised look on his face, while asking, "What are you doing here?"

Captain Marvel answered, "I've come to save the world."

Batman replied, "Then go help my arch-rival, Superman, stop Darkseid or something like that."

Captain Marvel responded, "I took a break from intergalatic fights and dance-parties, because this city needs me. Some bird-lady stole some of the world's deadliest blasters. I have to eliminate her, before she causes any further damage."

Batman was repulsed by the thought of a hero wanting to destroy their enemy. He sternly said, "Destroying people is never okay, never. You need to get your head out of the clouds and you need to check-up on your morality."

Captain Marvel was surprised that a bat-themed guy, with no powers, would back-talk her. She said, "You know, I could defeat you and it would take no effort."

Batman replied, "I'm not scared of you, not even the tiniest bit. You could defeat me, but you wouldn't, because you know it would be the wrong thing. It would also be wrong to eliminate Magpie, but you don't seem to understand that."

Captain Marvel responded, "But she's the villain."

Batman said, "Whether or not that's true, is an irrelevant fact, Ms. Danvers. Everybody has the potential for redemption. If you take criminals' lives away, you're also taking away the world's hopeful optimism and replacing it with a cynical, hopeless view of the world. The two most important people in my life were robbed of their future, because a dumb crook thought that eliminating them was no big deal. Do you want to make the same mistake?"

Captain Marvel thought about the situation and it was hard to argue with Batman's point. In her past, she had eliminated skrulls, because she thought they were evil, which wasn't the case. However, an argument popped into her head. She said, "I'm not fond of eliminating others either, but Magpie could destroy the entire city."

Batman replied, "You don't know her, especially not as much as I do. I've dealt with several criminals, who have good intentions. Magpie is certainly one of them. Despite the bad things she's done, all she truly wants is a family and I can relate to that."

Captain Marvel folded her arms and said, "All she wants is a family, yet she stole technology that could blow Gotham to shreds? Doesn't that sound fishy?"

Batman replied, "Magpie's not the one who wants to use the weapons."

Captain Marvel had a confused look on her face, while saying, "But she's the one who stole them."

Batman replied, "But she's not the one who's going to be using them."

Meanwhile, Magpie entered the Falcone family's building. She instantly stood-out, for her weird costume and goofy smile, especially when compared to the well-dressed and normal looking employees. A few people thought she was an intruder, but Mario Falcone assured them she was meant to be there.

Magpie was carrying the crates of blasters. However, it had been hard for her to carry, due to how many of them there were. Alberto Falcone ran up to her and said, "I'll help you with those."

Magpie sternly replied, "You better start helping. You have no idea how heavy these things are."

Alberto grabbed one of the crates, while saying, "I'm starting to get an idea, about how heavy they are." Alberto started running out of breath, due to heavy the crates were.

Mario gave him a disapproving look. He signaled to Sofia Falcone and said, "Let's show our wimpy brother how progress is made."

Sofia Falcone replied, "Sounds like a plan." Mario and Sofia started helping Magpie carrying the crates, while frowning at Alberto. Alberto sighed and walked away.

Magpie and the siblings went into the office of Carmine "the Roman" Falcone. Carmine stared at them, while looking as intimidating as possible. He said, "I'm a busy man, so you better have useful news."

Magpie smiled and replied, "I have the shiniest of news."

Carmine angrily asked, "What's the bird-girl talking about?"

Sofia explained, "She got the blasters, the ones that can help you dominate Gotham."

Carmine smugly said, "I already dominate Gotham. However, these blasters will further prove my superiority, over Gotham's citizens." He stood-up and started pacing around the room, while saying, "Gotham's a chaotic city and it's certainly a busy one. A lot of people think they're big-shots around here, but I'm the biggest one of them all."

Mario and Sofia started opening the crates and checking on the quality of the blasters. After all, they had very little trust in Magpie, so they wanted to make sure she lived up to her word. Mario said, "Father, may I test one of the blasters out?" Carmine nodded. Mario pointed the blaster at one of the windows and fired at it. The window got destroyed. Mario smiled and said, "These things make a big impact."

Carmine replied, "Destroying my window is going to make a big impact, on your next paycheck. However, I agree with your sentiment. These blasters are impressive." He faced Magpie and said, "To be honest, I thought you'd be a loose-cannon, but you did a fine job. So, am I supposed to write you a check or something?"

Sofia walked closer to her father and whispered to him, "Remember your deal with her? You can trick her into stealing anything, as long as you make her feel like she's part of the family."

Carmine replied, "Right. Mario, Sofia, please step-out for a moment. I need to have a word with your metaphorical-sibling." Mario and Sofia nodded and left the room.

Magpie looked at Carmine and said, "So, are you proud of me?"

Carmine tried to look like caring father-figure, while saying, "Excellent work, Magpie. If you keep this up, you'll become an honorary member of the Falcone family."

Magpie was truly delighted to hear that. She was used to people not caring about her and not believing in her potential. She said, "Thank you for giving me a chance, to show what I can really do. Stealing from S.H.I.E.L.D. felt a little rotten, but if it makes a positive difference in your life, then it's worth it."

Carmine replied, "It's very beneficial. What you did was right and you are like a daughter to me."

Magpie smiled and responded, "Thank you, Father." She hugged Carmine.

Carmine wanted Magpie to get out, so he said, "You've had a long week. Go out and get some fresh air."

Magpie replied, "Okay." She turned around and asked, "When will I see you and my siblings?"

Carmine answered, "Oh, very soon. We're going to be calling you."

Magpie smiled and said, "Sounds great." She admired the office's shiny objects, while walking out.

Magpie started running on Gotham's rooftops. It was a very dangerous thing to do, but she had several dangerous habits. Captain Marvel flew up to her and pointed her fists at her. Magpie looked amused, while saying, "Some hand-model thinks she can clip my wings? I don't think so."

Captain Marvel sternly replied, "I'm not a hand-model. I'm the one, who's going to make you lay an egg."

Magpie responded, "That's not going to happen, you oddly-dressed weirdo."

Captain Marvel raised an eyebrow and asked, "You think I'm the oddly-dressed weirdo?"

Magpie mischievously replied, "Indeed I do. You seem like someone, with no intentions on ever fitting in or leading a normal life."

Batman stepped out of the shadows and responded, "I know what that's like. Magpie, Captain Marvel isn't what you claim she is. "You're projecting your feelings about yourself, onto her, so you can feel better about yourself. All you're doing is providing yourself with cheap, unreal comfort."

Magpie stubbornly and angrily replied, "You're wrong about that."

Captain Marvel looked at Batman and asked, "You think you can defeat her, by using mind-games? Let me show you how it's done." She blasted Magpie. Magpie laid on the rooftop, while in a lot of pain.

Batman angrily looked at Captain Marvel and said, "You don't know how to control your emotions, do you?" Captain Marvel shook her fist at him.

Batman walked up to Magpie and held her in his arms. He looked concerned, while asking, "Are you okay?"

Magpie said, "I've never dealt with a more powerful hit. That woman's so impressively strong."

Batman said, "Magpie, you gave the blasters to Carmine Falcone, didn't you?"

Magpie replied, "Indeed I do and I'm thankful I did such a thing."

Batman asked, "Why would you work for him? What did he offer you?"

Magpie answered, "Family."

Batman asked, "What do you mean?"

Magpie answered, "For what feels like my entire life, I've been on my own. I'm crazy, out of control, so nobody wanted to give me a home or a chance in life. I thought I was doomed, until Carmine Falcone came. He's like a father to me. In fact, he and his children have become my family and I'm willing to do anything to keep their love, no matter what I have to do."

Batman shook his head and said, "Magpie, the Roman's not making you a part of his family. The only things he loves, aside from his blood-related family members, are money and power. He wants to become the ruler of Gotham City and he's willing to trick you and pretend to care about you, in order to make that happen."

Magpie stubbornly replied, "You're wrong. There's no way that could be the case."

Batman responded, "Then you should Mr. Falcone about it."

A few minutes later, Magpie snuck into Carmine's office. Carmine looked at the gifts that Magpie had given her, which included a card, a drawing of herself, and a teddy-bear. He said, "It's cute, that she thinks I want this crap." He lit a cigar and threw it at the stuff, in order to burn it.

Magpie had been secretly watching Carmine do that. She jumped out of the shadows and grabbed him. She angrily said, "You never cared about me, did you? I wasn't your next daughter or even your friend. I was just a pawn, a chess-piece in your game of dominating Gotham."

Carmine smugly pushed Magpie off of her and replied, "Well, it seems like you've finally hatched a brain. Too little, too late, though." He turned on his intercom and said, "Mario, Sofia, send a crew of henchmen. Bird-lady's getting kicked out of our nest."

Magpie grabbed Carmine. He tried to push her away, but her grip was too strong. Magpie said, "Your henchmen will be defeated by me, when the time comes. However, this is our time. One last moment of fake family-bonding, before I throw you out the window."

Carmine nervously replied, "You can't do this. We're on the top-floor. I'd die, if you did that. I know I'm not the best boss, but you could be essential, to this company."

Magpie responded, "Considering that you just hired some guys to eliminate me, it's kind of hard to believe you." She opened the window and was prepared to throw Carmine out.

Batman couldn't get there in time, but Captain Marvel was able to fly there and say, "Magpie, you need to stop this. Batman was right. Eliminating people, even criminals, isn't right. Carmine will face justice, not vengeance."

Magpie replied, "I don't think so. Carmine's done damage to my heart and feelings, that I'm not planning on forgiving him for." She was getting closer, to getting rid of Carmine.

Thankfully, Batman arrived. He used a grappling-hook to trap Magpie. Captain Marvel saved Carmine, before he could fall out the window. Carmine smiled and said, "It seems like I get a happy ending, after all." He looked down and saw that Captain Marvel had put a pair of handcuffs on him. He angrily sighed and said, "I lost." Captain Marvel smiled.

Magpie said, "I also lost. I thought I had gained a family, but I was wrong. Nobody ever has cared about me and nobody's ever going to."

Captain Marvel tried to make Magpie feel a bit better, by saying, "You shouldn't give up on hope. Despite how bleak things may appear, there's always a way to make things better."

Magpie replied, "Yeah right. Everybody hates me."

Batman responded, "No, I don't hate you. In fact, I can understand what you're going through. I lived a childhood, of feeling alone in the world. If I had tried harder and looked around the world, I could of found family and friends. As time has gone on, that's what I've done. Despite their flaws, the Justice League and my sidekicks are like family to me. That's hundreds of family members, so I don't think having another addition will hurt." He gently asked, "Care to join the side and family of justice?"

Magpie smiled and hugged and said, "It's good to finally feel like someone cares."

Batman replied, "I do care and I'm going to help you. Everything's going to be okay, old chum." Happy tears came out of her eyes.

Captain Marvel looked at Batman and said, "It seems like villains have potential for improvement, after all. I'm going to keep that in-mind, during my next mission."

Batman replied, "I'm honored to hear that. Feel free to return anytime, Ms. Danvers. After all, we're all one big family." Captain Marvel shook hands with Batman and Magpie and flew away, while being thankful to be a part of the family of justice.


End file.
